Social Anxiety

Social Anxiety / Social Phobia – Help/Treatment at Toronto and Sudbury THRIVE Programme

Now available across Canada and USA by Skype!

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Social Anxiety: The experience of anxiety, stress, worry, fear or apprehension regarding social situations and interactions.

Social Anxiety affects different people on different levels, from moderate discomfort in social situations, to complete isolation of the outside world. For those who suffer from this particular fear, their lifestyles can be extremely limited.

Many of us have fears of public speaking, job interviews, etc. that at the end of the day, though they are uncomfortable, we prevail and overcome those fears. For sufferers of social anxiety, the fear is crippling and avoidance of social situations becomes the focus of their lives. Whether it’s not attending the wedding of a family member or getting drunk before or during social encounters to help their stress, life is encumbered by those situations that others take for granted. If this sounds familiar, perhaps it is time to get help to overcome this problem.

 

Examples:Social Anxiety Cure

    1. Don’t like being put ‘on the spot’
    1. Find it very difficult to talk publicly
      or to give presentations
    1. Find large groups of people intimidating
    1. Find it difficult to make friends
    1. Lack confidence in social settings, being shy
    1. Find parties and small talk difficult
    1. Suffer with pre-exam or pre-test nerves
    1. Try and stick to the rules
    1. Sense of being watched
    1. Find talking on the phone difficult
    1. Frequently blushing, stuttering or stammering
    1. Find maintaining eye contact with people difficult
    1. Hiding, or keep yourself below people’s level of perception
    1. Fear of being judged, criticized, mocked or rejected
    1. Shy bladder (not wanting/able to urinate in public urinals)
    1. Sexual performance issues
      (e.g. impotence, premature ejaculation)
  1. Feel as though people may find out
    that you’re a fraud

 

Where does Social Anxiety Come From?

Social Anxiety manifests itself as a result of a variety of psychological mechanisms that are taking place that include your beliefs, self-esteem, thinking styles and personality.

We are taught many skills in life but rarely is anyone taught how the mind works and what mechanisms must be in place for anxiety to form. THRIVE’s unique approach is to give you the insights and resources needed to understand how you got here and how to get out. THRIVE is a SIX week, Seven session programme that will help you get over this problem once and for good. View progamme layout here.

 

Social Anxiety: A figment of your imagination?

 

Most people with social anxiety believe that it is something happening to them, it’s just the way they are. This however is never the case. Social anxiety is instead a reflection of a persons internal beliefs about themselves. It is not happening to you, it is happening because of your long standing beliefs.

Your beliefs are like a filter that you process the world with. Let’s say you think you look fat, you then process other peoples opinions of you through that filter “that person must think I look fat”.

Perhaps you were bullied a lot in school and as a result have the filter in place of “nobody likes me”. Now you avoid social situations because you use that filter and think “why even bother they aren’t going to like me”. You may be an adult now and those bullying incidents are far in the past but by repeatedly bringing them up they remain fresh in your mind and reinforce the belief and the filter remains.

A peculiar thing about a belief is that once it is in place your mind needs to reinforce it. So with the first example above, you may be told by many people how good you look today, but you never process it. It doesn’t match your belief so it get’s filtered out. You only focus on and process instances that back up your belief.

In the second example you may be out with a new group of people and they are getting along with you but since getting on well in new social situations doesn’t match your belief you begin to think “oh god I hope I don’t say anything stupid”. Once you have this thought you are almost inevitable going to look and act awkward. The other person will respond accordingly and may leave the conversation which you will process as “see I told you I would be awkward, I should have never come out in the first place”. Your belief has now been reinforced and the social anxiety cycle continues.

The THRIVE Progamme will give you the skills and resources to change this cycle and install new filters.
 

Have a look at some others who have undergone the programme and see for yourself how your life can change:

http://www.thriveprogramme.org/thrive-videos/

 

Why traditional hypnotherapy is not recommended for Social Anxiety:

Prior to practicing THRIVE, I was a hypnotherapist who used a mixture hypnotherapy and psychoanalysis solely in my practice. Unfortunately the success rate of hypnotherapy wasn’t near perfect so I made the switch to THRIVE to see what would happen.  I am now seeing more profound and lasting changes than I ever did with hypnosis.

Traditional hypnotherapy (also known as Suggestion Therapy) falls short because it deals only with the symptom and not the cause. In traditional hypnotherapy your Social Anxiety would be suggested away under hypnosis with suggestions like ‘you feel calm and at ease in social situations’. While you will probably leave the hypnotherapist experiencing less social anxiety, the originating cause of that symptom, the psychological traps, have not been addressed.

Because the mechanism that created your anxiety have not been addressed you are likely to fall back into your anxiety or create a new set of problems which can be worse than the original one you were trying to fix. This is known as symptom substitution and is a very real phenomenon.

For these reasons, traditional hypnotherapy (suggestion therapy) is not recommended for Social Anxiety.

 

Resolving Social Anxiety Permanently at Toronto and Sudbury THRIVE Programme

To achieve permanent results we need to get to the root of the problem. THRIVE is one of the best and most successful forms of training in the world for release of the root cause of anxiety and its related symptoms. THRIVE can offer you a permanent resolution to your problems, letting you live a life free from Social Anxiety and it’s symptoms. Along with your Social Anxiety, all other symptoms associated with those psychological traps disappear as well, leaving you more relaxed and in control of your life in general.

Other therapies including CBT, psychotherapy, EFT, NLP only ever deal with the symptoms of your anxiety, leaving the root to manifest elsewhere. Why control your problem when you can rid yourself of it once and for all.

Email: canadathrive@gmail.com Phone: 647-978-5040

 

Have a look over some testimonials of people all over the world who have undergone the programme below: courtesy www.thriveprogramme.org

This endorsement letter is long overdue; I first started working with Daniel ten months ago. After a lifetime of “allowing myself to feel” the symptoms of social anxiety – to varying degrees, I finally got fed up with the situation and was determined to fix things. I was sick and tired of blushing and periodic episodes of sweating in social and business situations. Moreover, I felt that my social anxiety was affecting other areas of my life but was unsure of how and to what extent. I searched on the internet with the intention of researching this problem and finding a quick fix.

After beginning to work with Daniel, I discovered that there was no quick fix; only some hard, yet basic work, on myself that had to be done – by me and for me. Daniel guided me through the Thrive programme by first helping me uncover and come to terms with some seemingly innocuous, yet significantly emotional, traumatic episodes that I had as a child. After these events were acknowledged and dealt with, we moved on to managing my thinking habits and eliminating negative and unhelpful thoughts. Concurrently, Daniel helped me focus on the enjoyment of life’s victories that I had been having – yet was unaware of. Apparently, if processed effectively, the brain can’t distinguish between getting a big promotion at work and getting a compliment from a client. The end result is the same level of increased emotional well-being. In addition to implementing other basic tools, I am now in charge of managing my own self-esteem levels and increasing my self-efficacy.

With respect to social anxiety, I have greatly improved my ability to interact comfortably with others in social situations. While there have been some “blips,” I am thriving in most situations that would have previously been problematic for me. I sometimes even seek out situations that would have previously unsettled me. The quality of my business and my personal interactions has improved greatly. From time to time (unexpectedly) I do allow myself to feel social anxiety and take full responsibility for these occasions. Invariably, these minor setbacks are due to me not managing my thinking as effectively as I have capably demonstrated in the past. I continue to implement and expand upon the tools that the Thrive programme has given me, such as: affirmations, being grateful, visualization, reframing, and positive recall. I fully expect to use the Thrive tools to manage my thinking for all the days of my life and eliminate even the mere prospect of social anxiety from my experiences. It is up to me and fully in my control. I plan to continue working with Daniel via Skype for any needed tune-ups and reinforcement of the Thrive methods.

In addition to dealing with social anxiety, I have had surprising and significant gains in other areas of life. Daniel helped me identify and manage the compulsive traits of my personality. Prior to the programme, I had difficulties maintaining a healthy body weight and my expanding waist size was causing intermittent high blood pressure readings. In addition to my existing exercise and nutrition regime, my ability to manage my thoughts and compulsive personality traits allowed me to reduce my stress levels, binge drinking, and eating setbacks. My body weight/composition has improved considerably and my blood pressure readings are “athletic.” I still occasionally enjoy a cheat meal and a night out for drinks, but these are under control and not a compulsive reflex to make myself feel “safe.”

Other unexpected gains have appeared in my social life, love life, and dealing with conflict. I have embraced “saying yes to saying no.” I am much stronger at getting the outcomes that I want and am managing my time more effectively. I am making better decisions that are based on clearer thinking and self-awareness.

Finally, prior to finding Thrive, I used to allow myself to feel depressed (accompanied with a bottle of wine) – all the while blaming it on work, personal disappointments, or the winter darkness. I can’t recall a time since I started working with Daniel that I could say “I was depressed.” I am dealing with life’s inevitable setbacks and challenges just fine.

We all have heard of the saying “you are what you eat” – how true! It’s also true that “you feel what you are thinking.” Thanks to Daniel’s guidance through the Thrive programme (and my efforts!), I feel a hell of a lot better. What’s more, if feels great to know that I am in control of how I feel.

Be well !

David

I found each and every session from the consultation to the end of the programme totally inspiring. I thought my life would always be the same.
How wrong was I, this has totally transformed my life from the way I mange my thoughts and to how understanding I am towards other people. I enjoyed the relaxation of each session, how easy it was to talk and the way Stevie explained the programme, in a way that was totally relevant to me. Everyone should do the Thrive programme.
The Thrive programme has totally changed my life perspective and outlook on my life, for the first time I think and feel totally in control of every aspect of my life, whereas before I was just resounded to the thought that this is just the way it is going to be.
I no longer feel socially anxious, don’t get stressed out because I am more able to manage my thinking, my self-esteem has rocketed, I have never felt so good and all of my anger issues are dealt with.
I can now express how I feel instead of bottling it all up, I can be anywhere and not be thinking what are people thinking of me, truly life changing.
If I would have purchased this book and not went through it with Stevie, I would probably still be trying the make sense of it this time next year. After 6 weeks I’ve got it, I was getting it after my consultation, thank you Stevie.
Allister.

 

I initially went to see Farhad to improve my confidence and my social anxiety.
We started at my early life experiences and set about changing the way my mind processed experiences in my past and day to day.
I thought the location was perfect, I always felt at ease and it was very easy access for my car.
I’ve learned to process the good things that I do everyday, instead of the negatives, I’ve learnt how to gain perspective on issues that make me stressed or anxious.
Moving forward these skills will be vital for me to push on in life and my career.
I think the thrive program was so impressive because all topics were touched upon, so as to suggesting any improvements; just do what you do Farhad.
My outlook on life and myself is much more positive now.
I now know that I am in control of my emotions.
My social anxiety is much lower now and I am thinking more internally about everything.
My current goal is to go full time with my career in performance and teaching.
I am very confident that by using the steps learnt on this course, I know I will achieve what I want in life.
The Thrive program is the first “life changing” book that has ever resonated with me, on a lot of occasions the book could have been an autobiography on the unhelpful thinking patterns that had been plaguing me for so many years, I’m now a different person… Thank you Farhad.
Any point I was struggling to understand, we went through in the sessions and with repetition I can say that I’ve taken everything on board and my life is getting BETTER EVERYDAY IN EVERYWAY.
Thrive is the only course that has really resonated with me, once you pick the book up, it is very hard to put down and covered all aspects of the unhelpful thinking styles that had become so automatic in my life.
With Farhad’s help, I have been able to change the way I process everything in my life and now I look forward with a new sense of optimism.
Doing this course has been one of the best decisions of my life!!
T.H

 

I found the sessions very helpful, being able to ask questions and clarify any points in the book I was unsure about. It was very useful to get an objective viewpoint – particularly on the personality type exercise.
The Thrive book and accompanying sessions have been a huge help in enabling me to think much more positively about myself and life in general. I now feel much calmer and in control in situations I would have previously felt anxious about – i.e. flying, giving presentations. My nail biting habit, which I had for well over 20 years, has virtually disappeared.
Tania was very good at putting me at ease, meaning I felt comfortable to talk about what was on my mind and ask questions. Items provided (chevreul’s pendulum + cube vs pebble) helped me understand key points more easily.
Cheryl, 36, formerly confidence & social anxiety issues

 

Before I met Claire sleeping was a real issue for me, I was finding it increasingly difficult to drift off at night and I had tried a number of well-known remedies but none had worked. After just one session with Claire on the Thrive program I noticed a change and after completing the course I can honestly say things are dramatically different, not only with my sleeping, but also in the way I think, and I would whole heartedly recommend Claire and the Thrive programme to anyone!
My mum suggested contacting Claire and when we talked it through with her she explained why she thought the Thrive program would be best for me. I got started on the workbook and over a course of around 6 weeks I completed all the reading and activities in the book, along with my sessions with Claire. Over just this short period of time not only did my sleeping vastly improve, but my self-esteem grew, I had a lot less social anxiety and I was generally a lot happier, more positive and felt more in control of my own life. Claire made me feel instantly at ease and her warm, welcoming personality made the sessions enjoyable as well as helpful and informative. The Thrive program sets things out in a way which is easy to understand, so although at times it can be challenging, it doesn’t seem too daunting and unachievable. Going through the book with Claire helped no end as she could help me when I became stuck on certain sections of the book, and she encouraged me throughout to continue with putting what the programme teaches into practice!
I have noticed a big change in myself since starting Thrive with Claire, and I know these changes will not be short lived. I am incredibly thankful to both Claire and the Thrive program for what they have done for me, and I am thrilled to say that I now have a ‘Thrive attitude’!

 

I contacted Sarah to help me with blushing and social anxiety. My anxiety was at an all time high and confidence at an all time low. With Sarah’s insight, she helped me realise how my unhelpful thinking was at the root of my issues. She also helped me to see what was really important and what I needed to focus on and how flippant I was being about a number of other big events that were happening in my life. Sarah really listens, makes you feel safe and provides helpful and caring guidance. She took me through the Thirve programme and it was done at a pace to suit me – with lots of encouragement, plenty of support through the blips and some laughs along theway. My confidence has improved dramatically, I barely blush now and generally feel much more relaxed. Thank you Sarah.
LH

 

I had experienced serious depression and a considerable degree of social anxiety for as long as I can remember. I had been in various forms of therapy and seeking self-help solutions for a number of years, with little discernible success. Depression dictated the patterns and contours of my life. However, with the THRIVE book, and the diligent, professional guidance of Helen Bartram, all that has changed in a matter of weeks. I am facing my future, even my present, for the first time in years, with energy, zeal and optimism. The change is remarkable and I cannot thank Helen enough, or recommend the program more strongly. Using clear language and simple yet insightful ideas, the book works to build your understanding and confidence, and provides regular points at which learning can be consolidated and reflected upon, which gives a tangible sense of progress and achievement. With Helen’s expert support, I sailed through the exercises and enjoyed the process. The progress I made was real and quantifiable. THRIVE, with Helen as Consultant, is a winning formula to a happier future. Seize the moment and THRIVE with Helen. I did.
Dean, Derby (via Skype)

 

Cure Your Emetophobia & Thrive’
For the past 30 years of my life, I have had a debilitating fear of vomiting in public. Before I had to leave my house I would suffer from panic attacks and would vomit as a result of my phobia. I would starve myself of food all day or make myself vomit, just in case I had to leave my home…I might vomit in public. Over the past 12 years I have spent thousands of dollars on “treatment” for my Social Phobia, Agoraphobia, Panic Disorder, Depression and Emetophobia nothing I tried worked. My life was an absolute mess! My fears were affecting my marriage, my children and my health. I was at breaking point.
In July 2013, I discovered Rob Kelly’s book ‘Cure Your Emetophobia & Thrive’. So I made an appointment to meet with Liz Hogon a Thrive Consultant, to try yet another treatment option. I went into this latest venture guarded and sceptical. Within 6 short weeks of meeting Liz and beginning the ‘Cure Your Emetophobia & Thrive’ program, my life changed dramatically. I used to suffer numerous panic attacks everyday and vomit sometimes as much as 5 times a day. Since completing this program, I haven’t vomited in 4 weeks! Only a short time ago I was terrified of leaving my house and of eating, I now put my two young children in the car and drive to places we have never been and have lunch in public places and I am finally loving my life.
Before discovering Rob Kelly’s program and working with my supportive consultant Liz, doing these things were unimaginable to me. I was a prisoner trapped by my own negative and obsessive thinking. This program is not a magic cure you have to do the work. But if you want to gain control of your life and not just live, but THRIVE then this is the program to choose. Rob Kelly’s book taught me how to live without fear of my own thinking and I am forever grateful as is my family.
N.B
(Melbourne, Australia)

 

Didn’t really know what to expect, but sessions were very informal and really straightforward. I never felt judged or that I was being melodramatic. The thing I enjoyed the most was learning how my mind worked and how I could change my thinking.
The biggest ‘relief’ is that I realise my past is past. Now-one is judging me for it and I’m the only one who was hung up on it. I feel like an equal now, and like and respectable and compassionate person, as opposed to somehow feeling inadequate and underserving of a happy life.
I’m far less concerned about how others view me and feel more confident socially. I can better control my thinking and dismiss negative thoughts quickly and easily.
I would urge anyone who has any kind of depression or fear to go through these sessions with Stephen. I have very (surprisingly) easily gone from not caring whether I lived or not, to now looking forward to each day and celebrating all the good stuff I have achieved.
K.

 

Before going to see Alison, I was suffering from social anxiety and panic attacks. It got to the point in which, I rarely left the house and wouldn’t go into social situations. Missing out on all the things teenagers would do was hard; as well as missing tonnes of college. From the very first session with Alison, things started to get better and progress was made. Alison is a warm, friendly individual who is very easy to talk too.
With Alison’s’ help, guidance and support she gave me different techniques and methods to use to help deal with different social situations. Using the basis of black and white thinking and reflecting on situations where good
things have come out of it. At first, I didn’t think it’d benefit BUT when using the methods, things became a lot easier to deal with and now my perspective of situations has changed.
Going from being isolated and not attending college; I’m now studying sports massage therapy, a Kinesiology practitioner and gaining work experience with a UK professional cycling team in this area of work. I’m now never missing social situations and throwing myself into everything that I do. It’s all thanks to Alison, without her, I wouldn’t be
doing what I’m doing now. Thank you!
Katie

 

Thanks again!
I had to buy this having bought the Emetophobia version to to see what else was in it and take my changes further. A great read giving me a real understanding of me and what makes me tick. I can now say “No” without feeling guilty, and no longer feel like a doormat. Self esteem is through the roof and the dreaded social anxiety is for the most part sorted. I’m now pushing myself with new things and its great. Everyone should get this – even if you think everything is 100% OK. Once again – Thanks!
C. O. Bell

 

My son was suffering extreme social anxiety, blushing and total lack of self worth. All of which was heightened by his Exams and College interviews etc.
It was after a very bad family argument that all his feelings and worries were brought to my attention. He was thinking that no one cared or even liked him and felt that he was a complete waste of space. He also admitted that on occasions he would not sleep over worry and anxiety. This, in turn was making him tired and unable to cope with the Exam/College situations. I know after this evening that he needed help.
My son is a very caring, gentle person and very intelligent. He had already done many Exams early and is an A grade student. He has a loyal group of friends and family around him but still was always looking for approval and constantly avoided any confrontation, even to the point of not voicing his likes and dislikes in case of criticism. He would not ask friends to go out or to come round in case they rejected the invite. He would believe that they did not like him enough. Therefore, he would only see friends out of school when invited and would sometimes not go out for fear of embarrassment etc. His body language was really bad, always looking at the floor and would not talk/smile at anyone until they spoke first.
I have several family members that have under gone Hypnosis for different reasons, i.e. smoking etc and had read/heard via the media that it could be used to boost his confidence. I found Clare by her website and we went along for the free consultation with her.
It was at the free consultation that she gave us a copy of the Thrive book and we went away to talk through the options she gave us. We agreed that the Thrive book was very useful and started the sessions with her. I went to every session and was involved, so that I could help at home and understand his needs.
We had 6 – 7 sessions altogether, going through the book, each section was so easy to do yet it really made you change the way you think and even talk. With Clare’s help we could trace back to where my son first started to doubt came from. He remembered an incident that happened when he was 5 years old; playing in the front garden with his best mate some other boys from the estate started to pick on them and pushed his friend. He stood between them and his friend, them telling them to go away. They pushed him to the floor and kicked him, laughing as they walked away. Needless to say I did not know about this until the sessions and was very upset he never told me. He even remembers telling his friend not to tell me or his mother and feeling embarrassed that he let his friend down. He then went on to suffer bulling through School, not telling me or others on most occasions. He thought that it would make things worse and on each occasion believing all of which was said. Therefore, backing up all his self loathing.
It was after the second session that I started to notice the difference in him. Small things at first, his moods were lighter and he started to talk more openly to me. I made a point of reading the Thrive book with him and we did the questionnaires together. It made our relationship better, we began to understand each other and how different our characters are. He did all Clare asked of him and carried out tasks/challenges that seemed silly at the time but all worked. At the end of the course my son was a totally changed person, he walks with his head held high, starts conversations with friends, family and even complete strangers, organising events and even asked girls to dance at the Prom.
It has now been several months since our last session and he does have some low days, as we all do but he has trained his brain to work well in any situation. He still does his lists and he corrects any negative thoughts with positive. He still blushes but shrugs it off, laughing at himself with others if anything happens. He has now passed all Exams with great results, attends a College out of his area, therefore he does not know anyone else who attends but enjoys every day. He is making new friends and keeping in contact with old, going out and having a great time. He still challenges himself and finds that he can achieve most but does not worry over any that do not go well. He is now taking driving lessons, passed his Theory test first time and plans to pass the full test at the end of November. He likes himself and being with others, he believes that he is capable of anything he puts his mind to.
I would like to take this opportunity to thank Clare for all her help and making this course so enjoyable, it never felt like hard work. My son and I have a great relationship and we have both learnt so much. The book Thrive is on the bookshelf in the lounge and is looked at by all family members. I believe that anyone who reads and puts in the effort required with this book will benefit immensely. Until reading Thrive you do not understand how important it is to train your thought patterns etc and that your quality of life will be so much better if you do.
Many thanks,
Mrs T

 

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